The 10 Deviousest Spider-Man Villains
Anyone who knows anything about Spider-Man knows Peter Parker is a nerd. The mask he puts on as Spider-Man changes that, allowing him to be someone else, but there’s still a jerk in there. Oddly enough, many of Spider-Man’s villains share his dumbest tendencies.
Whether it’s because of their own scientific knowledge, sense of humor, or simply a profound lack of freshness, Spider-Man’s rogues gallery contains some of Marvel’s biggest assholes. That doesn’t make them any less dangerous, of course. They’ve threatened Spider-Man and New York like few others, but they’re still a bunch of goons in suits.
ten The Enforcers seem to have overdosed on old gangster movies
The Enforcers seem like a tough bunch, but that goes away once their individual names are revealed. Montana, Fancy Dan and The Ox all look like rejects from the central cast of a 1930s gangster movie. Working for a criminal mastermind named Big Man, they fought not only Spider-Man, but also Daredevil, Dazzler and Human. torch.
The Enforcers bypassed the start of the Marvel Universe, also teaming up with villains like Green Goblin and Sandman. They’re pretty ridiculous to modern readers, and it’s surprising they’ve lasted this long.
9 Chameleon got lost in the identities he took on
On the one hand, Chameleon is an amazing spy who managed to torment Spider-Man with just his fabulous make-up skills. On the other, he’s Kraven the Hunter’s brother, which means he’s automatically the uncool brother. The chameleon would have been the kind of child who reads a lot of Fangoria magazine and idolized Tom Savini if he hadn’t grown up behind the Iron Curtain.
Chameleon is basically a special effects nerd who’s great at sneaking around. He’s such a jerk that he got lost in the mass of identities he created for himself because he doesn’t want to be who he is. He’s been fighting Spider-Man all along, but no one ever remembers him, which is pretty fitting.
8 Hammerhead’s best move is hitting people with his head
Hammerhead is what happens when someone thinks it would be cool to see Spider-Man fight a Dick Tracy villain. Hammerhead is another guy who seems to like old-school gangster movies, but the difference is that he has a metal plate implanted in his skull. This allows him to take a lot of head shots and use his head like a battering ram.
Hammerhead is known to work for Tombstone, which is definitely the Chad of the two, but they’ve also come to blows over the years. Hammerhead is a relic from another time and is definitely a villain that people will laugh at rather than fear.
seven Mysterio is all about special effects
If Spider-Man had a nickel for every special effects nerd villain he has, he’d have two nickels. It’s not much, but it’s still weird. Mysterio is arguably the most accomplished special effects nerd villain, but that doesn’t change the facts. Mysterio has spent years mastering his craft, even being able to trick supersense heroes like Daredevil and Wolverine.
Mysterio spends all the time he has perfecting his craft. Even though he hadn’t been in and out of prison, since he can’t really fight, he doesn’t have a life outside of being Mysterio. No one wants to hang out with him, even among Spider-Man’s often silly villains.
6 J. Jonah Jameson spent years hating everyone and everything cool
J. Jonah Jameson has shown that he has lightened up a lot in recent years, but that doesn’t change his years of hate. JJJ comes across as a power jerk. He hates anyone who can do things he can’t, like superheroes, and will use his pulpit to push his deeply uncool view of the world.
There are two types of journalists: the dashing ones, the cool ones everyone loves, and the grammar and politics buffs. Jameson was definitely one of the latter and went after everyone when he became editor. He’s learned his lesson, but he’ll never be cool.
5 The Sandman has the worst haircut and fashion sense ever
The Sandman has been fighting Spider-Man for a while. He was also a superhero at times in his career, rising to the level of a reserve Avenger. He has great powers and yet can never truly rise above henchman/B-list level. certainly not help.
Sandman has the Osborn family haircut, which barely works for them. His costume isn’t great either. Sandman can shape his body into anything, but he still chooses a green striped shirt and these pants. It’s almost like he wants to be a jerk.
4 Boomerang can’t help but be Dorky
The Sinister Six counts among its members all of Spider-Man’s greatest enemies. However, not all of them are successful villains. Boomerang definitely belongs on the dorkier side of Six. It’s hard to point to one thing that makes Boomerang a jerk. He’s got a cool costume, but everything from his gimmick to his sense of humor to his background proves he’s a giant jerk.
Boomerang’s stupidity is what makes him so endearing. He and Spider-Man have that in common, which is why they eventually made friends when they were roommates. Boomerang can’t help but be a jerk, but it definitely works for him.
3 Vulture’s age keeps him from running because he’s cool
The Vulture has been around for a long time. He’s been a thorn in Spider-Man’s side since the earliest Wall-Crawler adventures. He’s also always been deeply uncool. His business partner took advantage of him and he swore revenge, but he did so by robbing banks and beating a teenager.
The Vulture is Spider-Man’s oldest villain as far as age goes, which definitely puts him in the idiot column. He’s an old man who hates just about everyone except his grandchildren. It’s easy to imagine him yelling at people to get off his lawn and playing Glenn Miller records on an old but working Victrola.
2 The civil identity of the lizard is a gentle but silly man
The Lizard is a terrifying villain, a scaly engine of death. However, Dr. Curt Connors is basically a big softie. He’s the kind of guy who thinks science is super cool. He’s a good-natured jerk who just wants to use his skills to help people. Nobody makes fun of his stupidity because he’s just a sane guy.
Connors only developed his Lizard formula to be able to help people who have lost limbs. His love of science drove him to try to change the world for the better. It had some unfortunate side effects, but there’s no denying that his dorky scientist heart was in the right place.
1 Doctor Octopus is a bitter idiot
Doctor Octopus has changed a lot over the years, but his innate stupidity will always be a part of him. Otto Octavius was definitely made fun of because of his devotion to science and the bowl cut, which made him bitter. If it wasn’t for the accident that gave him his arms, he probably would have had a quiet life as a scientist, but instead he decided to take revenge on the world.
Octavius’ time as Superior Spider-Man proves he was considered a jerk in school. Once he got into Peter Parker’s handsome, athletic body, he set about satisfying his lowest urges, doing things he never could in his old dork body. Doc Ock is a first-rate jerk, and for him, that drove him to wickedness.
NEXT: The 10 Most Awesome Spider-Man Suits